Thread: The Funniest Top Ten List, ever quite possibly

this was from 2 years ago, but i remember watching it, and it really is I think the funniest Top Ten List.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJi0WOmZu2g#

Jay's Top Ten is the bread and butter of his show.

Originally Posted by MacDre707

Jay's Top Ten is the bread and butter of his show.

you mean david letterman......right?

that was great

Originally Posted by tgross791

you mean david letterman......right?

*shrug* their all the same.

She, eyes as dull as iron, swung her fist down at me as I lay on the ground. The pink shirt that lay on her shoulders, draping over her body like a torn rag, was filled with tears and holes. The "Hello Kitty" logo on her chest was drowned so much in blood that it was barely visible.

Jeans restricting her leg movement, she tried to kick me after I blocked her first hit. The ridge of the trouser was sliced right up to her knee. A gash as long as her arm was engraved into the flesh, crusted green with infection.

I didn't have time to respond. The stone-grey walls behind me meant that I couldn't kick off with my feet, otherwise I'd be in a worse situation.

The foot almost made contact when the Common Infected screeched and fled. Above her, on the roof of the house, stood an even scarier foe.

With a screech louder than death itself, it plunged into the crowding infected and hissed. Blood sprayed over the cluttered mass of writhing maggots as they tried to attack me, but they immediately disengaged from their attempt and dispersed through the street to avoid the deadly creature.

A few fearless infected raced toward me. I still couldn't move - my stomach bled from a claw wound inflicted from another attack. The being leapt up onto the roof and back down, digging it's claws into my clothing and dragging me back up with it.

I could hear the frustrated, possibly enraged roars of the creatures below as they failed in clawing their way up after us.

Eyes landing on the hooded person as it stared down at me, I shrunk back as it released a growl from it's throat and tilted it's head. Teeth bared, I dare not move.

Before a moment, it crouched low to the floor and screeched. It wasn't an ordinary human, nor a normal infected. I made no reaction and simply held out my hand in a gesture of greeting.

The being flexed it's claws, stalking around me like an animal trying to capture prey.

It, warily, extended it's arm out to me and pressed against my wrist. Before I could move, it leapt at me and, pinning me down to the roof, screeched for the third time.

I could see it now. It was a beautiful thing. The mystery surrounding it was great, but it was so handsome and brave.
I knew it didn't know what to think of me. Instinctively like any human or animal, it was cautiously watching my movement.

I tried to imitate it's voice and made a screech of my own, baring my own teeth in response to see what would happen. It wasn't as loud, but it was just as high in pitch.

The hooded being recoiled and I could see it's nose twitch almost curiously. Growling loudly, as if to communicate with me, I imitated it's stance.

My head tilted in rhytm to his. As his claws flexed, my fingers shifted.
It approached me quickly and pulled at my white hood that lay on the back of my neck. Dragging it awkwardly over my head, it leaned in and sniffed at my face.

My heart raced. It growled as I shifted back. None of the time I saw it's eyes.
I knew one thing though - I had to get to know this being.

Daringly, I bared my teeth and, cringing from the wound on my stomach, pulled at his hood. It jabbed at my hand and I withdrew it instantly, tilting my head and growling.

Suddenly it curled around me and hissed as a tall, skinny man waddled over with a limp.

It coughed at the hooded predator, almost mocking as it pointed toward me and flicked it's tongues.

Angrily, the predator lunged and easily bowled over the smoke-releasing man. Pinning it down, it struggled as the hooded being clawed at it's chest and pierced through it's dead, rotting flesh.

Eagerly and amazed, I hopped over and began scratching at the neck of the six-tongued infected. When it died, the predator stared at me and closed it's mouth.

It leaned over and, pinning me against the roof again, pressed his severely mutilated lips to mine. I could feel no pulse within his neck as I stroked his cheek, but I knew that this one was special.

This one I called Hunter.

-----------------------------

I was bored and I wanted to write about a Hunter.
I love Hunters, seriously. They're fierce and handsome. I love it when they screech, too, it's a nice tune. They're very stealthy infected and being completely silent when they're standing up makes them great to literally stalk your prey with - especially if it's a straggling survivor.

PHHHHHHHFTTWHAAAAAAP went the snaggle toothed catch. Latching on the face, the right ear, of a dirty black gargoyle, with a white cap on its head. Almost like poop, of a bird...

The man in the mask looked into the eyes of the woman, in her car, a little blue neon, nursing her little baby, a girl from the look of things. She couldnt of possible seen him from his point of view he thought, yet her infant, slowly flipped him the bird.

The lightning lit the skies up, lighting the image up of the uber man looking down into the city, and the baby, with its middle finger in the air, shadowing the flash bangs in the sky.