Thread: Bad report card? Try this!

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up.

Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad." With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.


Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it. Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son John


P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report card that's in my center desk drawer.

I love you.
Call me when it's safe to come home.

smooth. i hope thats a true story

too bad i can't really use it in college

Hahahaha.... xD Thats some good shit, while readin it i was like "Holy cow, wtf",and then when i read the last with the report card i was like "Holy cow, Wtf O.o"..

:6

I thought it was gonna end like, "PS, my report card sucks but I'm in deeper shit so what the hell"

Originally Posted by Bunni

or you could come to the bunbun for super low tax free rates, I tutor:
Math: AlgI-Cal3 (exclude trig and geo, know em but hate em)
Sci: Bio-Phys (both hs phys ap's B n C and all college levels)
Lang: Spanish, Japanese,
Hist. World Hist-Us his (NO GEOGRAPHY!), though give me a large headz up so i can review.
i needz money plp

Why don't you do it for free bunn-y? I'm sure it's good karma or sommat like that.

Thank you. I needed a good laugh to help on this crazy ass day I'm having.. :9

That's awesome