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Thread: How to know you need a new lawyer

  1. Registered TeamPlayer deathgodusmc's Avatar
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    #1

    How to know you need a new lawyer

    Man sues Bank of America for $1,784 billion trillion

    America has its share of ambitious people. But it is almost guaranteed that none in its lengthy history have filed a lawsuit against a bank for more money than Dalton Chiscolm. If my math is correct, Chiscolm is suing Bank of America (BAC) for over $1.78 septillion -- a septillion is 1 with 24 zeros after it. If Bank of America agreed to pay what its customer is asking, it would wipe out the bank's $196 billion in common equity 9.1 trillion times over.

    According to Reuters, Chiscolm was unhappy because Bank of America would not deposit some of his checks due to problems with their routing numbers. And his efforts to solve the problem with the help of a "Spanish womn" were unsatisfactory. Chiscolm's lawsuit requests damages for his suffering, specifically, he asks that "1,784 billion, trillion dollars" be deposited into his ATM account the next day. He also demanded an additional $200,164,000."

    Although Chiscolm's request sounds reasonable to me, I am not a judge. The judge in his case, U.S. District Judge Denny Chin, described his complaint as "incomprehensible." What's so hard to understand about the request? Chiscolm is angry with Bank of America and wants it to pay him about 30 billion times the world's total GDP of $60 trillion.

    Maybe it's time for the U.S. government to step in and bail out Bank of America so it can pay him -- after the $45 billion it's received so far, what's an extra septillion?

    Update. This is not his first lawsuit. In Janaury 2009, Chiscolm sued his landlord for $892 million billion dollars -- or $892 quadrillion. In his January complaint, Chiscolm alleged that "Manerment nor mainterntmen had no atcuse's to go in my apartment what so ever I had to keep a lock no the kichen cabernit." The court dismissed his complaint.

    Peter Cohan is a management consultant, Babson professor and author of eight books including, You Can't Order Change. Follow him on Twitter. He has no financial interest in the securities mentioned.

    http://www.dailyfinance.com/2009/09/25/man-sues-bank-of-america-for-1-784-billion-trillion/?icid=main|main|dl7|link6|http%3A%2F%2Fwww.dailyfi nance.com%2F2009%2F09%2F25%2Fman-sues-bank-of-america-for-1-784-billion-trillion%2F

    LOL just outstanding isn't it.

  2. Registered TeamPlayer Cainun's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    I laughed, in all honesty. I laughed extremely hard. All that cash be wired into your ATM account the next day? Hows about you check into a mental institution instead? Clearly the guy isn't right in the head, demanding that much cash.

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    #3

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    $1,784 billion trillion

  4. Registered TeamPlayer
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    #4

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    i see this going.. no where

  5. Registered TeamPlayer Red_Lizard2's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    I think he will win the case, but it won't be for the amount of money he wants. Likely it will just be for the damages (charges mostly) and a little extra probably. AFAIK judges get the final decision on how much is paid out in a lawsuit.

  6. Registered TeamPlayer flame's Avatar
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    #6

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    Anything over a billion would be damn near impossible to spend in one life. Aside from buying out corporation after corporation. I would be damn happy with a million. Ah but the american dream to sure for outragous amounts and be a trashy fuck. Even if he wins he's still crap.
    [SsT] Sigs and Avatars-sstflame-png

  7. Registered TeamPlayer Glitch's Avatar
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    #7

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    could spend a billion in one weekend.

    You need to visit better strip clubs!

  8. Registered TeamPlayer AKshun's Avatar
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    #8

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    Quote Originally Posted by flame
    I would be damn happy with a million.
    A nice home in the San Francisco Bay Area goes for a million or two... :5


    I'll catch up to the rest of you noobs... in about 3 or 4 more years.

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    #9

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    Quote Originally Posted by AKshun
    Quote Originally Posted by flame
    I would be damn happy with a million.
    A nice home in the San Francisco Bay Area goes for a million or two... :5
    Then don't live in crappy California.

  10. Registered TeamPlayer PuppyF4RT's Avatar
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    #10

    Re: How to know you need a new lawyer

    Quote Originally Posted by WorstPE
    Quote Originally Posted by AKshun
    Quote Originally Posted by flame
    I would be damn happy with a million.
    A nice home in the San Francisco Bay Area goes for a million or two... :5
    Then don't live in crappy California.
    LOL @ WorstPE

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