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Thread: There's baby mama drama
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08-30-11, 04:54 AM #3
Re: There's baby mama drama
Sigh...yes I know of what you speak of....it's actually not that bad for me at the moment. You just have to know how to speak to the "psychos" so they don't go psycho on your ass.
Actually I have a really good suggestion that I think will help you a lot. I was having a lot of trouble keeping my sons mother under control. She was very unreasonable, specifically she didn't want to let me have my son 1/2 of the time. I argued that he was my son obviously and that I had been voluntarily giving her (not court ordered and my idea after we split) a check every month for the last 3 years to help her pay some of her rent and other expenses. Basically my argument is that all of this entitled me to 1/2 time with my son and nothing less. Anyways she wouldn't budge and totally went psycho during many of our arguments.
And then...I decided to do some research on effective communication and I came across this book (Amazon.com: How to Win Friends & Influence People (9780671027032): Dale Carnegie: Books) I read the book and it completely changed my approach when speaking to people. They have in audio book as well, so you can listen to it on the way to work or something.
After reading the book, I have been successful in keeping my sons mother under control. I actually have my son more than she does now . I had to explain to her in a calm manner over a series of conversations that this wasn't going to work unless we were both reasonable. We both want to avoid the courts so we have an incentive to work it out on our own.
We still have our arguments but I have learned to talk to her effectively and doing so I almost always get my way. She still goes psycho every now and then but I now I always defuse the situation pretty quickly. Also (this might sound messed up) obviously woman are very emotional, the book taught me that at times I can play into her emotions to influence her and get what I want.
Anyways I can't say enough about the book. It completely changed the way I communicate with people and I'm positive that it can help you out.
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09-03-11, 04:29 PM #5
Re: There's baby mama drama
I'm glad for that Mafioso, unfortunately the father of my baby want's nothing to do with him/her. So I've already asked him to give up his parental rights and custody, along with child support to which he has agreed. I'll be doing the baby thing all by myself for the next twenty+ years.
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