Results 1 to 8 of 8
Thread: Left 4 Dead: 650 AD.
-
07-30-09, 04:52 AM #1
Left 4 Dead: 650 AD.
This is, at the moment, is just a test run of an idea, but if you like it I'm sure I could write more! It only currently features Bill and Francis, but mentions of Zoey and Louis are in there. I am planning to write more, but depends on if you like it.
I know it's written badly, I'm just tired. I can write better.
17th July, AD 650.
Francis Turnbridge, on any other day of the season, have been harvesting the crops, getting prepared for the harsh winter that was going to come. Any other day he would have cut the crops to give to his wife to prepare for food in the evening, or to make bread to sell.
Any other today.
Today he sat in the corner of this dark house. The wooden floors were the only thing he could see that reminded him of his previous life. His sythe grasped firmly in his large hands.
"Father forgive me. Father forgive me. Father forgive me." The chanting was almost silent.
Footsteps. Fast footsteps. The possessed. Closer. Closer. Closer. Through a hole in the wall one of the possessed raged in to the hell hole. Turnbridge grabbed his Sythe and stood up.
There was blood down both of their faces. Francis spat at the posessed and rubbed his beard.
"Satan, be gone." The sythe moved quicker than the eye could see. Blood stained walls became bloodier. The sythe edge stained even further. The demon fell to the floor. The satanic, crimson blood slowly eased away through the wooden floor.
"I must not stay here." Turnbridge was no longer safe here. Is the possessed know he was there they could not be stopped.
Francis stepped out in to the small village that was Rivervale. The bright sunlight beating down on him.
"Father forgive me. Father forgive me. Father forgive me." The pounding returned. The footsteps that he dreaded were again getting closer and closer. Closer and closer. Sythe raised, ready to free another poor soul.
"Francis Turnbridge." A famaliar voice echoed through the empty streets. "You were not consumed?"
The farmer lowered his blood stained weapon and slowly turned to face the voice.
"Father Overbeck, neither were you I see."
The old preist stood on the other side of the path. His hood down, the man of god lowered his crucifix.
"Come, my boy. Come, come! Make haste!" Father William Overbeck guided Francis in to the church. "I have word of a Brute approaching."
The church was empty, objects piled up against doors and windows. Turnbridge could not think of why he did not come to the church when the original possessions happened two weeks ago. Now was the time to get answers.
"Father, the possession. Can-"
"Can I stop it? Oh no, not me. These people are forgotten by god now."
"Do you know what it is?"
"The other priests believe it is Satan trying to call us away from God. Others believe it's the Lord's way of punishing us for our sins. I do not know what it is."
"Are there others?"
"I saw a woman in another building about three days ago, but a Crone blocked my path to her. I saw another man, a man from the continent, just before her."
Francis could not believe what he was hearing.
"What are these Crones and Brutes you speak of?"
"They are the spawn of Satan himself. Brutes posess the strength of ten men. Any survivors would not survive a Brute attack. The Crones are females who have been... endowed... by Satan. They are the closest to a human the possessed have come to as they still show emotion. The Groteque are corpulous possessed who can summon many other possessed through the use of their bodily fluids. The Recoil drag people away. One of these killed the last survivor I saw. The Female Grotesque harm any man through the use of bodily functions. The Avian leap high to entrap men. There is also word of another possessed like these, a Charge. Like a Brute, but they are fast."
Screams echo through the halls of the building. Growls and roars follow soon after.
"There's the Brute. Those barricades will not take a Brute attack, we must leave. Now."
----
So, is this worth my time, or should I leave it?
For people who don't quite get it:
Brute = Tank
Crone = Witch
Groteque = Boomer
Female Grotesque = Spitter
Charge = Charger
Avian = Hunter
Recoil = Smoker.I'm an idiot and I can't follow directions. So now I'm also banned.
-
07-30-09, 02:01 PM #2
yes keep up the work!
interesting way of writing but a bit too religious maybe? Not that this religious talk is bad but you kind of overuse it.
Also i personally felt that you use an high number of special infected, i mean these guys are in a village with a population of about 300 people. Maybe use more of them when way come to more populated areas and not start with a tank directly in some (remote?) village.
Anyways the rest was written in a good style and the idea of an infection in middle ages is great. Keep up teh work can't wait for Lord of the rings like battle where tanks crush castle walls
-
-
-
07-31-09, 02:13 AM #5
Bang. Bang. CRASH. Within seconds the door and all of it's defences had been breached. Raging towards the two men was a Brute. A huge creature, arms and torso defored almost beyond recognition.
And its face. The mouth was just a gaping hole at the bottom of the creature's head, tounge flopping out.
Francis grasped his Sythe defensively.
"Do you think we could kill it, or should we go?" Francis shouted to the Priest.
"Follow me, Francis. Hurry!" Father William was no longer to be seen.
Hacking away at the Brute with his Sythe, Turnbridge ran. Straight down the aisle. Crashing.
"TURNBRID-"
A sharp pain to the back of the head.
Darkness.
"Wake up. Please." A voice echoed through the pain in Francis' head.
Mumbling and moaning, a still alive Francis awoke to the site of a new man. A dark-skinned man who spoke with an italian accent.
"Who are you... where's Father Overbeck?" The farmer panicked "Is that thing gone?"
"Yes, gone. Slain thankfully. Here, I shall help you up."
Francis had his first good look at the newcomer. Darkskinned, almost as tall as he himself was. A friendly face, dressed in rich clothing and brandishing a large sword.
"My name is Louis D'Forccini DeCalpio, but names have no use now. What name did you once go by?"
"Francis... Francis Turnbridge. I lived here in the village. Owned the farm not far from here. Where is Father Overbeck, I must speak with him."
"He's helping my... companion. This Brute was already damaged so it was not as hard to kill. However, my friend did take quite a punishment from it. We must stay here until she is fully recovered."
Gabbling, louder and louder and louder.
"It is the possessed!" The Italian man brandished his sword. "Come my friend, we must hold them off until she is fit enough to leave."
Through the hole in the wall a steady, but large stream of the possessed raged through. Turnbridge's sythe could not be seen anywhere.
"No no no no NO!" Francis panicked. "LOUIS. SYTHE!"
The possessed were on Francis yet again, but this time there was no blade between them. Trying with all his might he pushed one over which hit another and another. A cascade of rabid bodies crashed agains the bloodstained Church floor. Blood filled the air as limbs flew through the air. Francis punched and kicked. One to the face, another to sweep the legs. Stamp on the head. The horde of possessed slowly grew smaller and smaller and smaller until there were none left.
--------------------------------------
Ok, quicko part 2 introducing Louis. I had a problem of wether to make him Black or not to avoid an anachronism, so I decided to make him Italian.No racism meant if you pick up on any. I was gonna describe him as a "negro"!
Oh, and that won't be the end of the Possessed Attacks.
Hope you enjoy!I'm an idiot and I can't follow directions. So now I'm also banned.
-
07-31-09, 03:17 PM #6
Oh, I do like this loads! It's certainly a new take on the Left 4 Dead storyline.
Just a suggestion, why not change the Boomer's name of the "Grotesque" to the "Glutton"? I just thought of it because the Boomers aren't really grotesque like the Spitters.
It's your story though, I don't like to force ideas on people.Whilst playing Penumbra...
Parlock: I CAN HEAR IT.
Dead Prodigy: HIDE.
Parlock: I AM.
Dead Prodigy: DON'T LET IT SMELL YOUR FEAR.
Parlock: IT DOESN'T NEED TO SMELL MY FEAR, I SHAT MYSELF.[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
-
-
08-01-09, 02:29 PM #8
I enjoy the idea a lot! I think you've shown a lot of creativity thus far. I have a few suggestions though:
Next time you write a story, don't put in a lot of information too soon! You should have revealed the special infected and their olden time names over time.
Try included other special infected. We've already seen the ones you've described. Surprise us with something new.
- fight with me, not beside me -
Thread Information
Users Browsing this Thread
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)
Bookmarks