Thread: lil joke for ya

One night a guy walks into his bedroom with a lamb under his arm. His wife is laying in bed reading a book and he says out loud, "This is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache"

She looks up from her book at him and says, "that's a lamb you fu#$in moron!"

The man says to his wife, "I wasn't TALKIN to you!!!!"

Gasrim

That was great specopspock. I just about dumped myself it was so funny.

Originally Posted by asianator365

That was great specopspock. I just about dumped myself it was so funny.

LoL Anisiator653 :9


I got another joke for ya:

There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas."
When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!" The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas."
After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident.

Scared to death, the blind man started shouting, "Don't flush, don't flush!"

Why does the bar have a swimming pool?

hotel bar.

i give all 3 :9

a boy comes home from school and his dad asks what he learned in school today. the boy says that his homework is to learn the difference between potentially and realistically.

the dads say's thats easy. just go upstairs and ask you mom if she would sleep with the mailman for 1 million dollars.

the boy comes back a few minutes later and the dad asks him what mom said. the boy replies that she said definitely.

the dad says okay now go ask your sister. the boy leaves the room and returns a few minutes later. she said yes too the boy informs his dad.

the dad says okay and then says to the boy,

we are potentially sitting on 2 million dollars,

but realistically we are living with a couple of whores.

maybe y'all will like this one more:

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. Suddenly the
sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said,
"Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant
you one wish."

The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want.

"The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the
enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required
to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take!
It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is
hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more
time and think of something that would honor and glorify me."

The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish
that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside,
what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she
cries, what she means when she says 'nothing's wrong,' and how I can make
a woman truly happy."

The Lord replied, "You want that bridge in two lanes or four?"

Gasrim