Thread: Ohhhh Salty

As you all know we got ourself a really intresting person.... I have had alot of BS'ing secsions with him and really got gold :9 here is to you my friend

This is one of those epic conversations......

[SsT]salty99: I been to laughlin several times, don't care much for it though
{HRD} gatita_andy: I go for the gambling
{HRD} gatita_andy: so much fun
[SsT]salty99: haha
[SsT]salty99: you a card counter lol
{HRD} gatita_andy: LOL I play black jack
[SsT]salty99: Security: hahah what's the count babe? huh
[SsT]salty99: Andy: im sure i dont know what your talking about
[SsT]salty99: security: don't play dumb with me missy, theres no way you won those last ten hands on dumb luck
[SsT]salty99: Andy: I'm just a little Bolivian here for so fun card games, I don't even know what a count is
[SsT]salty99: Security: well i've got my eyes on you lady
[SsT]salty99: Andy: (whispers) sucker, I'ma clean you out like a cupboard
{HRD} gatita_andy: LOL :]

well everybody needs a little Salty

Anyone ever want to talk to meh, hit me up on xfire. Maybe i can tell you a depressing story and you can laugh at my expense

Sounds good to me =)

This one was epic I highly sudgest you all read it :9

{HRD} gatita_andy: ok I am going to do my french manicure so i will respond when I can LOL
[SsT]salty99: i will attend to your inability to type by providing you with one sided entertainment so you don't have to type anything
[SsT]salty99: i will take on the role of andy and carry on a conversation with myself

[SsT]salty99: andy: so salty, how did you end up where you are? you say you're half mexican but you live in arizona.
[SsT]salty99: salty: well you see andy, we were a mexican familiy who had actually been living in honduras, you see there was this evil corporations names xavcorp, run by the dreaded xav family
[SsT]salty99: they had started a revolution in an effort to overthrow the government and establish a new system of sugar cane distribution.
[SsT]salty99: fearing for our lives and being forced into exile, we headed for los estados unidos
[SsT]salty99: and with the xav family rounding up everyone into forced labor camps we didn't have much choice but to flee for the boarder
{HRD} gatita_andy: ohhh I am sooooooooo saving this conversation
[SsT]salty99: it was when we were half way to mexico city when poncho villa and his revolutionary posse stopped us to force us into his military band of ruffians
[SsT]salty99: luckily we had just arrived at my aunt carman's home and were able to hide all of the men under the floorboards so that they wouldn't be caught by ponch villa
[SsT]salty99: the women bribed poncho villa with a glass of sweet tea, and a big texas honey bun. when the coast was clear, the men canme out from under the house and we once again headed for the boarder
[SsT]salty99: unfortunately for us, our cousin felipe (wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed) had an unfortunate run in with the farmers who operated on the plot next to his
[SsT]salty99: he claimed that they had been stealing all of his chickens through the fence when he wasn't around. now you have to see here andy that felipe had somewhat of a temper when it came to people stealing his chickens
[SsT]salty99: andy: wow, salty. sounds like he's quite the trouble maker
[SsT]salty99: salty: boy, you haven't heard anything yet
[SsT]salty99: so one night he takes a wooden spatula from aunt carmen's house and sneaks over to the rival farm to see if he can find out what they've been doing with all of his chickens
[SsT]salty99: he sneaks into the barn and looks in astonishment at what he sees...
[SsT]salty99: andy: what?! what does he find?
[SsT]salty99: salty: he sees industrial packaging holding all of the chickens that have been preserved using newly distributed cane sugar
[SsT]salty99: andy: no! that would mean that...
[SsT]salty99: salty: yes! now you're getting it
[SsT]salty99: it turns out that the rival farmer is a pawn of xavcorp and is implementing the new distribution of cane sugar to preserve and package my cousin felipe's stolen chickens
[SsT]salty99: felipe slowly sneaks into the house to find the rival farmer and question him on his new illegal business practices with xavcorp
[SsT]salty99: he acidentally steps on a creaky floorboard and wakes the rival farmer, the rival farmer is very angry and grabs his cane (which unbeknownst to felipe, also houses a shotgun)
[SsT]salty99: rival farmer: is that you felipe? why don't you come in here and let us talk this through like men. i know you've been out of work for some time now, it must be hard now that xavcorp is picking up all of your clients eh?"
[SsT]salty99: felipe: you know nothing of this situation you flaxless bootwench!
[SsT]salty99: felipe jumps at his opportunity and strikes the rival farmer with his wooden spatula repeatedly
[SsT]salty99: the shotgun goes off in all of the commotion and both combatants recive minor wounds to their left index fingers
[SsT]salty99: felipe, clutching his boo boo runs out the door and flees for our aunt carmen's house
[SsT]salty99: he arrives just as my family prepares to head for the boarder once more
[SsT]salty99: felipe: salty, i have made a terrible mistake and cannot live with the concequences of my actions. you must let me travel with you and your family. you see we both flee persecution in search of a better place
[SsT]salty99: salty: andy there will be time for questions at the end, you are supposed to be manicuring your fingers. that is why i took on your role
[SsT]salty99: maybe you can post when i am done
[SsT]salty99: CHAPTER: 6 a dream deferred
[SsT]salty99: under the cover of darkness, salty and his family set out once more for the boarder
[SsT]salty99: it is a long and difficult road ahead of them, there are swamps, rogue futbol-ers, and banditas de juevas
[SsT]salty99: felipe's wound on his finger is aching and could possibly become infected if he does not seek medical attention soon.
[SsT]salty99: luckily for felipe, there is a small shed up ahead with a large red cross on the side
[SsT]salty99: felipe: look salty a hospital! que lindo
[SsT]salty99: he rushes inside and finds to his amazement a beautiful bolivian nurse working all alone during the graveyard shift
[SsT]salty99: salty: i'll keep going, you can read this at your leisure
[SsT]salty99: felipe: why nurse, who do oyou attend to all of these nights out here in the middle of nowhere?
[SsT]salty99: andy: hey salty, this sounds strangely familiar, isn't this copyright infringement?
[SsT]salty99: Salty: andy if i have to tell you one more time that there will be questions at the end, you will have to go sit in the corner. now are we ready to listen again?
[SsT]salty99: Andy: yes sir (she grudgingly responds)
[SsT]salty99: so the nurse replies to felipes question.
[SsT]salty99: nurse: well we get many patients here in the desert, over on that cot on the far end is senior ruiz, and the one next to him is his wife patricia
[SsT]salty99: felipe casts a worried glance at the others. it seems that the nurse's patients aren real people. her "patients" as she refers to them were nothing more that a deflated soccer ball and a dead cactus
[SsT]salty99: fearing for his own safety , felipe as well as the others flee when the nnurse says she must take a "light call" and administer pills to her patients. it appears these years out in the desert have made her dillusional
[SsT]salty99: on the road again the family grows weary, and they are all out of water. making thier way much farther without water would be a difficult task
[SsT]salty99: luckily, ther was a stream nearby that the local populace had buildt. a small sign nearby read "agua del corazon" salty read it and thought nothing of it
[SsT]salty99: the family drank and were ready to go on when he had a strange tingling feeling in his stomach. everyone suddenly began flying
[SsT]salty99: Andy: wow, flying? it must have been something in the water huh?
[SsT]salty99: Salty: how very correct you are, here have a cookie
[SsT]salty99: so the family at a much quicker pace flew towards the boarder
[SsT]salty99: the sun was just beginning to rise over the vast expanse of desert when the boarder came into sight
[SsT]salty99: felipe: look! it's the boarder, we've made it!
[SsT]salty99: just then blood burst from felipe's chest and he fell to the ground.
[SsT]salty99: xavsnipe, xavcorp's deadly assassin was dispatched to take care of felipe after his little run in with one of xavcorp's clients
[SsT]salty99: extremely disheartened, yet not willing to give up so easily, salty and his family crossed the boarder until...
[SsT]salty99: Andy: until what?!!!!
[SsT]salty99: Salty: well would you look at that? I'd say you're up way past your bedtime missy
[SsT]salty99: Andy: pleassseeeeeeeeeeeee! just a little more?
[SsT]salty99: Salty: well i'm sorry my dear, perhaps tomorrow night
[SsT]salty99: Andy: oh fine
[SsT]salty99: i find clever ways to oentertain ppl
[SsT]salty99: lol

damn salty....I actually read all that...I don't know if you're crazy or just have too much time on your hands coupled with short story writing creativity....


very nice...you missed the part where I marry andy

Originally Posted by Xavsnipe

damn salty....I actually read all that...I don't know if you're crazy or just have too much time on your hands coupled with short story writing creativity....


very nice...you missed the part where I marry andy

Ah but the story is not finished my friend I am only half mexican, the other half comes from my dads Welsh ancestry; and thus you've only heard half the story Perhaps in future chapters you may end up with our Bolivian nurse haha

Wooohoooooo