LuckyDucky

So I'm going to try and post more often in my blog thing, this is mainly a promise to myself so I doubt it will come to fruition. My hypothesis, if the number of posts determines the size of your e-peen then the number of blog entries determines the size of your e-balls. If this is true then I must get to work quickly or my manhood could be in jeopardy!

Anyway, what I really wanted to talk about was this dream I had last night.

Starts of pretty boring, I'm driving a car down some empty road in the middle of the night in the middle of a desert. My cell phone rings, the view point then switches to a third person outside the car looking in (like a flying camera next to the car), I notice I'm allot older but more importantly wearing a shirt that is entirely black with the word "Me" scribbled on it in what appears white marker. The dialogue that ensues is mostly inaudible except for the key phrase "It's all fucked up". Apparently spoken by me. I hang up the phone and the view switches back to first person, at this point i realize that the person who spoke "It's all fucked up" said it in MY voice, but the phrase came from the phone. So I was essentially talking to myself.

I then drove into a town and parked on an unnamed street. Once i got out of the car i was greeted by a faceless man, at this point the view once again switched to third person and another inaudible dialogue except for a phrase spoken by me (this time actually spoken by my physical form) "I don't care about any of them". The man nods his head in agreement and leaves me alone. I enter a bar that is nearby and proceed to drink, drink allot. Strangely I never actually become drunk. After about 6 beers I notice that the building I entered is actually a nightclub (flashy multicolored lights EDM type music etc etc), and I was the only one sitting at the bar while everyone else in the club was either dancing or chatting and sitting at tables with their friends.

The view once again switches back to first person. After my tenth beer the barman (once again a faceless character) tells me "You will not forget, but you can write", he is cut off at the word "write" and the rest of his words are inaudible once again. I turn away from him and focus my attention on one of the tables at the far corner of the building. All the people sitting behind it are faceless, except for a woman, someone I recognize but can't remember because she is also much older. We both stand at the same time and walk to the dance floor, we begin to dance together, at this point I realize that I am in a dream. But I do not change anything or attempt to control the dream because I wanted to see how it would continue.

We both return to the bar I was sitting at before, the barman is absent from his post but two drinks are conveniently placed there for us. The view again switches to third person as we both take a sip of our respective drinks, but this time I notice we are both much younger, and I have returned to my real world age and but I still cannot recognize the girl sitting before me. The view quickly switches back to first person and the girl begins to talk (again inaudible), she appears to be enjoying herself and I also appear to be enjoying myself.

While she is talking I suddenly had the urge to kiss her, so I gently took her arm. but before I could continue further my dream abruptly ended. So here I am, back in boring old real life. The dream made me severely depressed so I proceeded to go to the kitchen to find some Nutella to cheer myself up. Apparently we ran out of Nutella, so it was either going outside and buying some at an overpriced store or writing this blog.

Anyway the whole thing depressed me because of underlying cruelty of it all, I get to dream it but not live it. I get to see it, hear it, but never actually experience it. My own mind's creations only serve to highlight the things I wish I could have most in life. It's like I'm taunting myself.

I'm forced to remind myself why I hate that line of thinking and that it inevitably leads nowhere, there are better and more real things to think about. So in conclusion; Fuck My Dreams.




On a fairly unrelated note, I really don't like how you are never indicated when somebody has removed you from their friends list. This is especially aggravating in Steam, where even if that person has removed you they will remain on your list as "offline". This results in stupid cases of having people on my friends list that are reported to not having been online for 180 days. Or more importantly, when somebody hasn't been on for a week and you're wondering whether it's because you're removed or if they are taking some vacation from gaming. Why can't steam just send you a message "Person XYZ has removed you from their friends list"? Then you can go and remove their name as well so it doesn't take up needless space.

Even places that auto remove the person from your list if they removed you are annoying. Because if you have say 70+ people on your list you may not even realize its happened for several days. If a "this person wants to be your friend" message is in place the surely a "this person is no longer on your friends list" message should be just as simple to add... but whatever.

Maybe I'm just raging to much.