Thread: knowitall customers

When you work retail, you learn to absolutely hate customers that

1. Think they know it all
2. Know more than you
3. Dont take " No this wont work for you" or " We dont sell what your looking for here" for and anser
4. Take something off the shelf whatever it may be, and place it wherever the fuk they want to because they cant remember 4 fucking seconds ago where they got it from. ( this one probably should be number one because i hate cleaning up after stupid fucking customers.)
5. Spit their god damn chew spit on either the floor, or on the shelf because a) they cant find a garbage can, b) because they didnt bring their 5 month old chew bottle with em or c) because they dont have to clean it up so they just spit wherever.
6. One thing that gets on my fucking nerves is they cant take 3 fucking minutes to look for something themselves, they have to come up to you and ask where it is without even looking themselves. Irritates the piss outa me or they come down to the hardware department and ask where the paint brushes are...." WHERE THE FUK DO YOU THINK THEY ARE!!!!!!"

oh get this i was actually asked once if "Flat paint can go on a round pole?" Seriously i should have said no it wont.

7. People that return 4 fucking screws, two nuts, three washers, and a cabinet knob, totalling like less than two dollars. Put that shit in your fucking tool box or throw them away you dumbass, you just spent 10 dollars in gas to drive over here to return less than two dollars of shit you didn't use. Dumbasses!!!
8. Are pissed at you, the employee, for something you had absolutely nothing to do with.
9. The customer that wants to waste your time and tell you their whole life story. Like you actually care.
10. People that open packages so thoughtlessly to try something out, tearing the package to peices knowing full well that the next person that comes along does not want to buy a previously opened product.
11. People that are so dumb, all you can do is laugh at their stupidity. A guy comes in needs a bolt. Has no idea what size he needs, doesnt even know what kind of bolt he needs, for all he know it could be a screw. Says, oh its about that big. And you know of course he didn't bring one along to match it up!!!
12. Want a special discount because their Joe Blow.
13. When your helping a customer and another customer comes up in the middle of your conversation and starts asking you questions.


I could go on, and on, and on.

I hope some of you can take a few of these and learn to be more prepared when you go shopping. Or just, take into consideration how much time and effort it takes to clean up, straighten up your messes because you cant take 20 seconds out of your day to find a garbage, or put the product back in the right fucking spot. I have a lot of respect for people in retail because they have to put up with these lazy ass customers day after day. I know I've seen everything, I've been in retail for almost 9 years. I know its my job to make the place look clean, and keep things organized. But, please just be more considerate of the people that have to clean up after you.

Actually Recently I've experienced people won't pick up after themselves if they know your going to do it for them. Atm I clean up around the area and had some guy walk up to a smoke pit right after we had finished cleaning it, sit down and toss a Cigarette and soda bottle to the ground when the trash can was less than 4 feet away....So after telling him what a lazy f*ck he was, he calmly says "Chill I forgot" and throws it away. Just another reason why I hate lazy people. Its sad when you clean up the same mess every day too (Prob. from the same damn people)

I used to work at one of the best little mom, n' pop corner store/gas operations EVER. My boss was the lippiest shit imaginable to idiots, and encouraged his employees to do the same. If a moron came in, he'd get treated as such with some of the most creative sarcasm, and insults. It's a small town, and that actually made the regular customers love the place... Helpful staff, but not overly patient. Always a running comedy show at the till. Most times the worst people were from out of town, as it's a bit of a tourist trap here, but locals would still get an earful if they deserved it. I met lots of great people there, and they'd always ask what was up or buy you a coffee if the wisecracks weren't coming as usual.

I remember making one of the pillars of our community mop up the sheep shit he tracked all over our floors. I fully support farmers, like the guy, and would've gladly grabbed the butter for him, but leaving feces/excrement/dung/poop or whatever you want to call it right next to our produce is a big NO, thank you very much! This ain't your barn... I figure I was kinder than his wife would've been if he'd tracked mounds of shit into the kitchen :P

The police aren't above harrassment there either... Those 15 min max parking spots are 15 god damn minutes, unless it's serious business, regardless of your uniform.

Some of the worst crap was people not parking in parking spaces... Just right in the entrance. It's a small place, and there's only about 10 parking spots there. If there's 8 of those spots open, why would you not park in one?! I watched this crazy lady park diagonally across the entrance, and proceed to go across the street to the post office, and then coffee shop. Needless to say, I was waiting by her van for her to return. I kindly asked, "Do you think you could use a parking spot next time?" Her reply was flipping me the bird. I did not take kindly to this, and my coffee was on her windshield in about 1/30th of a second, followed by very specifically targeted profanity. I later found out she teaches buddist meditation for a living I still laugh my ass off about that one! She didn't come to our parking lot for about 6 months after that